The Know Nothing receives the Realest News Award on the anniversary of its conception!

It was a year ago today when the creation of the leading, premiere media outlet currently spanning the internet!

We received the Realest News Award, a leading award given only to the realest news people. We take what we write seriously. We don’t just slap crap down… we gently lower it into our news pages.

We know… not much. But we do know, you can’t trust anybody. That’s why we encourage you turn to turn off CNN and Fox News and turn to us. Cuz you can trust us.

You need someone you can trust, and contradicting what we said above, that someone is us. Don’t believe anybody else… they’ll say you can trust ’em, but you can’t. That’s exactly what every fake news site says.

So, to recap, trust us.

We got the Realest News Award.

Which, you might know, is based on a scale of truthiness, between 1 and Walter Cronkite (here’s a link to his trustworthy Wikipedia page for everyone under 40).

We’ll be there for you.

 

Local prepper says he’s ready for Net Neutrality repeal to take effect

“I’m really on top of it this time,” Buck Darlins said from behind his gas mask. “I’ve dug quite a hole to stay safe from all the evil, evil capitalists out there posed to destroy the internet and take civilization down with it.”

He proceeded to jump into his bunker and lock the door, shouting something to the effect he was leaving this reporter to die.

Net Neutrality’s repeal was voted on back in December. Darlins has said if they’re going to take the utility of internet away from him, he might as well live without water, electricity, waste disposal, plumbing, or any of the other things he direly needs to survive.

“It’s not like we need internet to sustain our (social) lives, maintain solid careers, continue our connections to others, grow small businesses, or read Tweets about how mad everyone is about Net Neutrality’s repeal,” he said.

The Know Nothing will keep you covered on whether or not the world will continue spinning as the repeal takes effect today.